If you don’t know what to do, because you don’t know what you did wrong…
and you’re always tired and confused…
and going crazy with the mental anguish of wondering what more you could do to fix the situation…
and you feel that there is nothing more you could have changed about yourself to be accepted and loved…
and the grief of this is consuming you…
you’re either currently being narcissistically abused, gaslit, and manipulated…
or you’re just waking up to the fact that you are or have been.
Please know this:
You don’t know what you did wrong because you did nothing wrong. You can’t fix things because you didn’t break them. And you won’t ever change yourself enough to be accepted and loved by those who can’t accept and love themselves.
The grief will consume you if you continue to approach this situation with logical thinking and continue to deny patterns. Narcissists and those with any Cluster B personality disorder are the most illogical, irrational people you will ever have to deal with and their patterns repeat again and again and again…
The mental anguish you’re feeling is understandable. You’ve been through a hell that no one understands unless they’ve been through it. But no amount of making excuses for them, allowing yourself to be taken in by the love-bombing and future-faking will ever make them change. You will never get an apology. And you will never get changed behavior.
When we are being abused in any way, all we can do is: 1) accept it, or 2) make plans to stop the situation by leaving and, 3) put up boundaries and going No Contact.
It’s simple, yet oh so difficult, I know…
~Robin xoxo
Robin Donnelly 